No Cake on the Farplane
by Kurissyma san Tybalt
Summary: The dead UNsend themselves to attend Yuna and Tidus' wedding. That's Seymour, Yunalesca, Lord Zaon, Shuyin, Lenne, Auron, Jecht, Braska, Yunie's mom, Rikku's mom and a whole lot of old enemies... what havoc will ensue? Tiyuna and vaguely Lukka


**Dear Faithful Readers,**

**Well look at me, writing five pages of something that _isn't_ Lukka! Are you surprised? I am! LOL, well _enjoy!_ I certainly had fun writing it! And don't forget to drop a line or two on your way out, yeah?**

**Love Always,**

**Becky**

**XxxX**

**-**

**No Cake on the Farplane**

It was Yuna's wedding day and everyone was there, even those she would rather were elsewhere. Seymour, for example, had _un_sent himself for the occasion, as had Lady Yunalesca and her Lord Zaon. Thankfully, not all the Unsents present were enemies.

'Sir Auron!'

'High Summoner Yuna,' said Auron, taking her hand, a certain note of pride in his gruff voice. 'Congratulations.'

'Where is my idiot son?' asked Jecht, grinning as he looked about the beach. 'Late as usual?'

Auron cuffed his friend over the head, 'I thought you were going to try and get along with him?'

'Well he's not here, is he?' said Jecht, 'and speaking of who's not here… where the heck did Braska go?'

'My father is here!' gushed Yuna.

'Somewhere,' said Jecht, scratching the back of his head, 'wan'ed ta be the one to give his little girl away- It's all he's been talking about lately.'

'Did you see which way he went?' asked Yuna, 'I mean… not to rush away… but-?'

Jecht laughed heartily at her stammering and Auron nodded in amusement, 'I think he went to judge your poor fiancée.'

Yuna smiled, 'I'll find them, goodbye!'

'Yunie!' cried Rikku, 'you must come and finish getting ready right now!'

'But I am ready,' said Yuna, looking down at her gorgeous wedding dress and smiling.

'Yunie! You have to let me do your hair!'

'But I already-'

'Yunie! Come on!'

Yuna smiled at her friends as if to say, "well, what can you do?" and let herself be dragged back towards her hut in the village.

There was quite a crowd in her small hut when Yuna and Rikku arrived. Lulu and Paine were sitting on her bed, looking bored by all the fuss, Tidus was making a fool of himself in front of Braska, and Wakka and Lulu's father were teasing the girls about their short skirts, while Lulu's mother gushed over fashion with Yuna's.

'Nice, Lully,' said Lulu's father, using his nickname for her, 'dignified… but sexy.'

Lulu glared at him, though secretly delighted her was there, 'you're not allowed to say that,' she told him.

'Am I?' asked Wakka.

Lulu thought for a moment before replying, 'I think that would be appropriate.' Wakka complied and she smiled, 'thank you, love.'

Yuna grinned at them and waved excitedly before Rikku shoved her over to the dresser, sat her down and began combing out her carefully groomed hair.

'Yuna, look beautiful!' cried her mother, stooping down to her level, 'you're the perfect bride!'

Lulu's mother agreed brightly and set about doing Yuna's nails in a bright shade of pink.

'Hey, Yuna,' said Tidus, looking over, grinning.

'Yuna,' said Braska, turning away from the red-faced Tidus he had been in the act of embarrassing, 'you have grown up well.'

'Thank you, father,' said Yuna without moving her lips as her mother redid her gloss.

With a last reassuring glance at Yuna, Lulu and Paine slipped out of the crowded hut and started towards the temple, where the wedding would be held, to help the village fusspots with some last minute decorating, leaving Yuna with her parents and twenty years of catching up to do.

-

Wakka soon caught up with Lulu and Paine, not having much to do about Yuna's place now that they were gone.

'Why aren't you still with Yuna?' asked Lulu sceptically as he took up pinning decorations beside them.

'Because all they talk about it hair and make up,' said Wakka, 'pass me that wreath, ya. Thanks.'

Lulu smiled, 'well it _is_ a wedding.'

'Is Lord Braska still intimidating Tidus?' asked Paine with a hint of amusement in her tone.

'Ya,' said Wakka, 'poor guy, maybe I shouldn't have left him.'

'It's a test of faith,' said Lulu, 'if he survives until the evening, they can have their wedding as planned- don't you remember my father at ours, Wakka?'

Wakka grinned at the memory, 'ya.'

It had been difficult seeing their parents after so long, Wakka's hadn't turned up, but Chappu had. It had not been awkward, as they had both secretly expected, he had been genuinely happy for them, his only comment about the match was 'well you certainly took long enough about it.'

'Meanwhile,' added Lulu, 'my mother was being just like Yuna's and fussing like anything… perhaps we ought to have saved them…?'

'Naw,' said Wakka, grinning, 'we had to go through it, ya.'

Lulu smiled.

'This is why I'm never getting married,' said Paine dryly.

'Oh, you will,' Lulu assured her.

Paine's response was a grumbled, 'doubt it,' but neither Wakka nor Lulu heard it- time had passed without their knowledge and the wedding music, provided by an Unsent Lenne, had begun.

Embarrassed, the three ran ahead of Yuna up the isle to take their places. Wakka, as best man and the girls, as bridesmaids.

-

Yuna smiled at Lenne, who was singing near where Shuyin was sitting, grinning widely at her. Even years later, she couldn't help but think that their resemblance of herself and her love was uncanny… Ah, but all was well now.

Her eyes fell upon a very smart looking Kimahri in a tux, he was smiling that scary smile of his and grimacing, at the same time, at the smell of the perfume Rikku had spilt on him in her rush to get ready. They exchanged happy glances and Yuna reached the altar feeling giddy with happiness.

Father Zuke began the ceremony with a long, dreary poem of Braska's choosing- he had not, it seemed, come too late to fiddle with the program slightly- and finished with the traditional "you may kiss the bride," to which Tidus obliged, ever so chastely, as the intimidating but warm-hearted Lord Braska was still watching.

The wedding was over and everyone rushed to crowd the bride and her new husband and the parents to converse lightly with one another in the background.

'Truly a fine young man,' said Braska, looking upon Tidus fondly, 'worthy of my daughter.'

'Eh,' said Jecht grudgingly, 'he's a mite on the scrawny side but he's dependable enough.'

'Getting along,' Auron reminded him.

'Eh,' said Jecht again, shrugging.

'At least he's sober, Auron,' said Braska, smilingly

'Nothing but shoopuf milk, didn't I promise?' said Jecht proudly.

'Then I'd hate to see you when you _are_ drunk,' said Yuna's mother, the bouncy Al Bhed.

The corners of Auron's mouth twitched in amusement.

'What was that!?' cried Rikku, who had been –ahem-_eavesdropping_-ahem- 'did Mister Grumpy-Boots just smile???'

Auron raised an eyebrow, 'whatever gave you that idea?'

'Oh, no, you can't hide it!' said Rikku proudly, 'I saw it, I did.'

'I think she's right, old friend,' said Braska, laughing, 'you're going soft.'

'Like a month old pretzel,' Jecht agreed.

Auron didn't reply, half because of his 'strong-and-silent' approach to life and half because he couldn't think of a comeback witty enough to show the young Al Bhed up.

'That's my little niece!' laughed Yuna's mother, 'where's Cid?'

'Training,' said Rikku simply.

'For what?' asked her aunt.

'The stampede for the cake,' said Rikku, who always won, before lowering her voice a degree or two as if about to reveal an important secret, 'it's chocolate.'

'You're going down!' giggled Yuna's mother.

'Says you!' cried Rikku excitedly and the two rushed off at warp speed.

'Father,' said Yuna, walking up to their group, 'where are Rikku and mother going?'

'Cake,' said Jecht.

'I… see…' said Yuna between giggle fits, 'how long are you all staying?'

'Just the one day,' said Auron gruffly and Yuna's face fell.

'We don't belong here,' said Braska.

'But we're definitely coming to the Christening!' said Jecht, grinning. Braska and Auron turned hard gazes on him and he laughed, 'what? I figure that if he can get himself married to little Yuna here, maybe I underestimated him!'

Auron clumped him on the back of the head, seeming almost amused again.

'What!' he said again, this time defensively, 'it was a compliment!'

'Then go say it to _him_ instead of embarrassing yourself here,' said Auron and Jecht glared at him, arms folded.

'I'm very happy for you, princess,' said Braska, 'it was a match well made.'

'Thank you, father,' said Yuna, 'but do you think you will return soon?'

'Only if I get to dress them up,' said Rikku's mother, Florie, popping up out of nowhere, much in the same way as her daughter always seemed to, 'your mam and I had _such fun_ tidying the boys up!'

Yuna smiled.

'Three hours wasted washing my hair,' said Auron, 'is not fun.'

'It was necessary,' said Florie, grinning, 'and you still had that Seymour fellow's blood in your fingernails.'

'I resent that,' said Seymour, mouth full of cake.

'I apologise,' said Yuna, 'but you had to be stopped.'

'There's no cake in the farplane,' said Seymour forlornly.

'Feel free to take some back with you,' Yuna offered.

'It's just not the same,' sighed Seymour, walking off unhappily.

'Don't worry about him,' said Seymour's mother, who looked younger and him and more… human, 'he's been depressed ever since he died.'

'I don't blame him,' said Yuna and Anima scurried off.

'Well, it's getting late,' said Yuna's mother, returning with Rikku, Lenne and the largest slice of cake she could carry, 'we ought to get back.'

'It's movie night,' Lenne explained.

'Yes,' said Auron, 'but it's Shiva's turn to pick the show,' he shivered noticeably, 'us guys will stay a little longer if you don't mind.'

'It's better than Ixion,' said Jecht, shrugging, '_Black Beauty, The Black Stallion, The Majestic Horse, Flicka, _that guy's got hooves for brains.'

'Well, anyway, goodnight, my princess,' said Braska, kissing her forehead softly, 'I will miss you.'

'Goodbye, father,' said Yuna, 'goodbye, mother, until we meet again. Sir Auron, Sir Jecht, Aunt Florie, Lenne, goodnight.'

Shuyin high-fived Tidus and came to join them, 'night guys.'

Several other Unsents wandered up, said goodnight, and were gone in a puff of pyreflies.

Odd, though it was, the dead had been the life of the party- except for Seymour, who had spent the entire evening in mourning- and now, with them gone, all the exhausted guests wanted a good night's sleep.

'Goodnight, Yuna,' said Lulu, hugging her almost-younger-sister and nodding towards Tidus, 'goodnight.'

'See y'all, guys,' said Wakka, beside her, 'Tidus, don' do nothing I wouldn't do, ya.'

'What wouldn't you do?' asked Tidus.

Wakka thought for a moment and grinned down at Lulu, 'nothing,' he said, shrugging, 'guess all that's left is goodnight, then.'

Lulu gave him a cynical look but nodded and stepped back from Yuna to smile at the couple, 'a few years sooner and I would have killed you for suggesting it, Tidus,' she said, 'but I'm sure you'll be very happy together now the Eternal Calm is truly upon us.'

Yuna smiled, 'there will never be calm until Rikku gets married and settles down.'

The small group turned to their Al Bhed friend and her Brother scarfing down the cake and laughed heartily.

'What?' asked Rikku defensively, mouth full of cake, as they laughed at her.

Yuna shook her head, still laughing and excused herself and Tidus, beginning what had to be one of several thousand hopeful new beginnings.

The beginning of the end and her Happily Ever After.


End file.
